So Sick of Being Tired and Oh So Tired of Being Sick

The last several posts have been me begging myself for consistency in my running regimen and yet here I am again posting about a run 6 days after the previous. At least this one wasn't entirely my fault as I fell sick last week and spent nearly the whole weekend in my room, extending to yesterday. I probably didn't have to stay home from work yesterday but anymore I tend to go all out combatting sickness, trying to beat it in as few days as possible. I hate being sick. So of course I went running last night. Maybe I should have stayed in, but I tend to try exercise toward the end of a sickness as a way to flush the last bits of crap out of my system - a method which is not backed up by science at all, but whatever. Also in this particular case I'd been laying/sitting around for three days straight and it was driving me crazy. Thus I found myself in my running gear, slipping into my running shoes, and setting off on my Fort Greene loop on the same day that I called out from work because I was congested with a pounding headache. A headache which did not appreciate the rhythmic striking of feet on concrete, but which subsided after about a mile of running. The wobbly knees faded as well, though the sore abs as I nearly a mile and a half were not a welcome replacement. In the end I managed to complete the loop fairly easily (even taking a phone call toward the end of it) which I attribute mostly to the fantastic weather, with temperatures hovering right around 70 degrees. So easy to run when it's not muggy and hot. Such a pleasure. I suppose, though, I really do have to get better at running when I'm not comfortable. Pushing myself when conditions aren't ideal. Today and tomorrow will be good practice, since the weather will be returning to uncomfortable summer levels. We'll see if I'll be able to run easy, even when the running is hard.

Later and Later, the Latening Gyre

So two days late. I dislike that I'm letting myself slip on these, though to give myself a bit of an extension I just ran again yesterday. As I start running every day I don't actually think chaining posts together will be worthwhile, as this whole blog was meant to be immediately reactionary, and an exercise in consistency. But here we are.

Anyway, Monday was the Labor Day 5K at Roosevelt Island. Since I'd run there in April to start the summer (spring?) I decided to run there again to end the summer and see what kind of improvements I'd made to my time. For the record, in April I ran this course in 30:03 and then a few weeks later I ran it again in about 28:30. This time? 28:59.

There are a lot of reasons why I ran a worse time than when I ran this course in May, despite several additional months of running, including a 7.5 miler. Monday morning happened to be incredibly humid, which certainly got to me in the first mile of the race before it started to break. I didn't respect the course, and so didn't prepare (hydrate/stretch) properly the day before. I hadn't run for a week leading up to the race, and since the heat wave in July I'd only been running about twice a week.

Really, though, my biggest downfall was pacing. I ran that first mile faster than I ever do normally, which put a lot of unexpected stress on my legs and led me to walk somewhere during the second mile. Twice.

And this was a problem born mostly from competitiveness and a lack of familiarity with my own ability/limits. As I started the race and the scrum separated I paced myself with runners faster and better trained than myself. I had an inkling that I was running faster than normal, but as people continued to pass me I was determined to keep up. I pushed harder, worrying more about other peoples' progress in relation to me and less about how I felt, and how I was running in relation to my own ability. This is a problem I've noticed in earlier races, most notably the J.P. Morgan Chase Corporate Challenge in which I thought I was running very fast because I was passing people the entire time, when actually I ran a terrible time and was mislead by the slow pace of other runners. I need to get to a place in running where I'm familiar with - and comfortable with - my own speed and level of endurance. I can't let the ability of other people dictate what I do.

This is something that extends past running, as well. Generally in life I - despite my best efforts - tend to get bogged down with concerns about whether I'm keeping up with my peers, or with some standard of human achievement. Have I advanced enough in my career? Am I behind my friends that are married and having kids? I remember when I used to believe very strongly that you can't judge your own happiness by other peoples' goals, but it seems like I've forgotten that in recent years. As with my running, I've got to get back to that place in life where I can strive for the things I want to achieve, and not worry about how well other people are performing relative to what they want in their own lives. Other peoples' standards do not have to be my own.

Anyway, after the demoralizing race on Monday I decided to redouble my efforts to run more often and more consistently - especially since I'm apparently going to be running back to back 10Ks in October. The distance is very doable for me, but I'll have to train to get to the point where I can push myself for 6+ miles on consecutive days. I'm quite looking forward to the challenge.

To wit, I ran yesterday evening despite sore legs, and managed to complete the Fort Greene loop in one go, without stopping, despite some side stitches and some early calf soreness. It was a pretty average run, but considering it was the day after a race I'm glad to have completed it. For some reason this year I've tended to over-rest, giving myself a break after fairly short runs. I'm not intimidated at all by the 5K distance, so I'm not sure why I've felt I needed a day off after running it in race or in practice. I'll still have to watch out for knee pain, but sore legs have deterred me far too many times this year.

Hopefully I'll be able to hit a double loop of Fort Greene park later today, since it's generally not until that third mile that I really start coasting and after that, on the single loop, the end comes far too quickly. After all, what's the point of battling through that 2-mile wall if you don't cruise through on that runner's high?

Run easy.